The online publisher, "The Mighty" has published my story. The Mighty is a digital publisher connecting people facing disease and disability. Our stories are shared across the world’s largest media platforms. Please following the link below to read my story.

http://themighty.com/2015/10/what-i-learned-as-a-parent-of-a-teenager-who-self-harms/

I'm an honored to have been chosen to be interviewed by Stephanie Hopkins for the B.R.A.G. Medallion award. Please follow to the link to view the interview.

http://layeredpages.com/2015/10/01/interview-with-b-r-a-g-medallion-honoree-theresa-larsen/

My son turned 21 today. There have been many days in the past when I did not think he would live to see another birthday. He lives with severe depression, suicidal thoughts, and sometimes psychosis. He lives and he is thriving. Some days I don’t know where he finds the strength, yet he does. He is a fighter.

There have been times when he has said to me-

“I don’t want to start over, I just want to finish.”

“I don’t want to go on, I just want to give up.”

“I don’t want to feel this way anymore, I just want to die.”

And he hasn’t quit. He has gone on to establish a life for himself, a life that he has chosen on a path of his making and he is happy.

A year and a half ago, my son was struggling to find a reason to live. I stepped back instead of charging forward. I stood by my boundaries instead of caving in. I took a risk instead of taking over. And because I did and because of the steps he took something shifted in him. He changed, he grew, and he found a reason to live. This was not an easy thing to do for either of us. My son had spent 17 months in residential psychiatric treatment, he had learned many positive skills to help him cope, and he knew the boundaries that were in place. I wanted to coddle him and protect him, but that was no longer healthy for me and no longer helpful for him. He had to take responsibility for himself. It could have been the wrong choice, but at that moment it wasn’t the wrong choice.

I asked my son months ago about that difficult time in his life and he said, “I never want to be in that place again.”

September is suicide awareness month. Knowing the signs of suicide can save a life. There are fantastic organizations dedicated to suicide awareness on my resources page.

Remember that suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. No one knows what life will bring in the next hour, day, week, month or year.

My daughter sent me a link to this amazing poem by Meggie Royer who looks at suicide from a different perspective. Please check out her work.

http://writingsforwinter.tumblr.com/post/125560163524/the-morning-after-i-killed-myself

The most powerful comment I saw about this piece was from a man who’s brother completed suicide and he said, “He didn’t end his pain, he just passed it on.”

I love my son very much and want the best and brightest future for him. A future that he choices for himself and one that creates happiness and peace in his life.

Thank you Tabrizia Jones for this 4 Star review of "Cutting the Soul"
https://cupofteawiththatbookplease.wordpress.com/2015/08/05/book-review-cutting-the-soul-a-memoir-by-theresa-larsen/

Theresa Larsen's uphill battle with her son's mental illness emotionally and beautifully discusses an issue that unfortunately doesn't get the attention that it deserves. I'm not saying that this was not an easy read and I'm not just discussing the uncomfortable and descriptive details of Matthew's trials. But difficult for someone who has suffered through mental illness, like myself. I needed to read this, not just to be informed, but for my own well being. Like both Matthew and Theresa discovered, I wasn't alone in my struggles.

Usually when you read about mental illness, it's always in the point of view of, in this case I will say, the patient. So it is refreshing to read someone's experience dealing with a close relative's mental illness. When you hear about a person suffering through depression and other mental disorders, you always concentrate on how it is affecting that person, but you rarely think twice on how it affects the whole family. You truly don't understand the physical and emotional toil it puts on a family, the financial burden that they have to go through. When reading this memoir, it is a huge eye opener. Reading about Larsen's experiences proves why this issue needs to be openly discussed and backed, especially from insurance companies. This is an important issue that just cannot be set aside.

Larsen's emotions are radiating from these pages. You can feel her pain when she sees her son at his worst. You can feel her frustration when she sometimes loses hope. You can feel her fear when she thinks that every time she visits her son it will be for the last time. I applaud Larsen for writing Matthew's and her family's struggles. It must be very difficult for her to relive these painful experiences. But I think it was necessary. It might have been cathartic for her but her story needed to be told for others to know that you are not alone in this and there's hope at the end of the tunnel.

Larsen refers back to Matthew's writings from his journal and even though it was uncomfortable to read at times due to its dark nature, I believe it was very important. You are reading what Larsen is going through which is vital but you need to know what Matthew is going through in his own words and you get that through his journal writings.

If you are uncomfortable reading about dark, personal matters, then this memoir may not be for you. But I hope you change your mind because in my opinion, I feel that this is a type of book that everyone should read. This is an important issue that should definitely not be bypassed.

My latest article on PsychCentral grew from a conversation I had with the parent of a transgender child. It discusses the challenges of this transition for parents and why they feel talking about it is difficult. Check it out on the link below.

http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2015/08/09/the-line-between-parenting-and-political-correctness/

I am always looking for ways to be healthier and happier, so when I saw this infographic I wanted to share it. It gives a variety tips, from mind to body, on how to be increase your mood.
Click on the link to check it out.

http://www.northwestpharmacy.com/healthperch/boost-your-mood-naturally/

Please click on the link to read my latest article on Psych Central.

http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2015/07/03/how-to-survive-when-your-child-has-a-mental-illness/

"Cutting the Soul" is live on USA Book News

http://www.usabooknews.com/automem.html 

My teenage son took a knife out of the kitchen drawer. Feeling stripped of power and control, he believed the only thing he had left was pain. Behind the locked door of his room he began with his left arm. With each slice he traded his emotional anguish for physical pain. It was just enough to suppress his desire to die. An inch into the pain, a mile into the suffering.

I discovered my son was cutting after he gouged his hand severely enough to require stitches. It was only after I asked him to wash his hands, and I pulled up his sleeves, that I saw the other marks.

What did I do wrong as a parent?

That is what I asked myself. I was angry and confused. Why would he cut himself? Why would anyone want to deliberately hurt themselves? What I didn’t know was that his internal pain was far greater than anything he could have done to himself physically. I didn’t know that he had been suffering inside for many years and that he had buried his misery deeper and deeper only to have it turn into self-hatred and spill out from self-inflicted wounds. I didn’t know that watching himself bleed helped him feel real, in control, and sane. I didn’t know that every day my child fought to keep himself alive. Every day he won his battle and I never knew there was a fight.

After the anger vanished, I wondered why I didn’t notice that my child needed help. I wondered why he didn’t or couldn’t or wouldn’t come to me and tell me about his torment.

That is when the blame started.

I blamed myself for not being a good enough mother. I blamed myself that my sweet boy didn’t think I would understand how he felt. I blamed myself that maybe I was too busy or too self-involved or too anything other than the “perfect mother.” I blamed myself that I didn’t know. I believed I should have known. This was my child. Wasn’t I supposed to have some kind of intuition about these things? Wasn’t I supposed to protect my child from all the harm that came into his life, but how could I protect him from himself? How could I take away my child’s pain when I didn’t even know it was there?

How does a parent of a self-harmer heal from the physical pain inflicted on their soul? One small step at a time.

I had many steps to take and lessons to learn along the way. I learned how to validate my son’s feelings so he felt heard, acknowledged, understood, and accepted. I learned that I needed counseling just as much as he did. I learned that I could not fix his behavior; he would have to want to do that for himself. I learned that I didn’t have to be the “perfect mother,” just one that listened to what her child had to say, didn’t judge the choices he made, and loved him unconditionally.

With each step I not only helped myself, but I helped my son. I stood by his side, I helped him through difficult times, I counseled him, and I also reluctantly stood back and let him make mistakes, and each time he faltered, each time he fell, he would get up and start over.

I learned that being a parent wasn’t what I had dreamed it would be, instead it was painful, brutal, arduous, and exhausting. But being a parent was also rewarding and fulfilling and no matter what obstacles I had to face, being a parent always required love and acceptance, that is a true parent, where you learn that you can trade pain for love.

I recently had a conversation with a woman who is a parent coach. She is "coaching and educating parents on the parent-teen relationship, letting go of the need to control, how to help kids become super problem-solvers, infusing values into parenting. . .in other words, how to raise teens to confident, self-sufficient adulthood and maintain your sanity along the way."

http://www.yourfamilymatterscoach.com/

This is such important work in today's society where parents want to hover and smooth the path of their children, thus taking away daily learning experiences. All parents need to learn these skills so that we can send the next generation of leaders into the world prepared to lead and not just follow.

Also have a look at her recent article on lessons she learned from parenting.

http://www.parents-space.com/17-lessons-i-learned-as-a-recovering-parent/

This short film about anger and mindfulness is excellent, please take four minutes to watch it.

http://amysmartgirls.com/short-film-just-breathe-helps-kids-deal-with-emotions/

I was asked this question recently and thought it was worth posting.

What are your views on treatment for mental health conditions?

Mental health wellness should encompass a multitude of treatment programs from medical to holistic. I do not think only one remedy is right for the recovery of someone who is diagnosed with a mental illness. Treatment should be approached from many angles such as exercise, nutrition, medication, skills training, talk therapy, art, and music. Incorporating a number of life skills with therapeutic skills gives the person with an illness a greater chance of moving forward to a place of life-long healing.

One size fits all does not work for mental health treatment. Explore multiple options and have a variety of skills and options in your toolbox.